The One I've Been Waiting For

The greatest feeling
Is being alone.
Not the happy thinking alone time…
But the wretched silence
Of knowing you are alone,
And no one is coming
To be with you,
Because no one cares you are gone.
Stare into the eyes of pain
And let it take over
Let it numb you
Learn even if for a second
What it means to be alone
To not know what the presence
Of someone who loves you
Feels like.
Welcome to the void.
Welcome to your worst nightmare.
Welcome to my life.
Utter rejection at every corner,
The true pain is in what is known.
The unknown offers the slightest
Glimmer of hope,
But what is known only offers
Pain, bitterness, and tears.
I once thought I knew
What it felt like to have someone close,
But like everyone else,
They left me.
Why aren’t you gone,
Like all the others…
Why are you smiling at me?
What could such a wretch as I,
Scorned by all
Possibly be doing to make you smile?
Stay away…
You’ll be just like everyone else…
You’ll get just close enough for me to trust…
Then you’ll run my heart through,
Just like everyone else
Could you be the one?
Welcome to the unknown.