Lovedrunk Sometimes all you need is a good cry, When the pain becomes too much, And the world feels like it's crashing down. You tore my world to pieces, You drove the knife right through my heart. You've done a dance on my grave, And spat upon the ground where I lay. I was fed lies, Drunk in what I thought was love, I was outside my mind. As the rain pours from the sky, I feel less like the rain Is only over my head. I'm no longer lost, My head and heart are healed. My pain is gone. The sound of your name No longer stings. I can sit in my car Without hearing your voice. I can reminisce with others, And I'm no longer secretly dying inside. I wish you could see me now. I can finally look you in the eyes, And not want to hate you, And everything you are. I have been freed from your stupidity, From your lack of understanding, From your inexpressible inability To care about what you have done. The nightmares are gone, The dreams turned to ash long ago. I wish I could have shut myself down, Saved myself earlier. All you taught me is how to hurt, How to anesthetize myself, Swallow the pain, And breathe. Thank you for everything you've taught me, Goodbye, Don't forget to leave me alone, And remember no one will ever Take care of you the way I did, Or love you the way I did. No one will measure up That's how I was raised.

A Nice Piece of Art

Picking up your brush,
Movements with such grace.
You make angels watch in wonder.
My heart is your canvas.
Amazing me with every stroke,
As you make your mark.
Making it clear to everyone
That I am yours.
The colors flowing together
Tell beautiful stories
of the joy you and I share.
With a heart of purest gold,
You are the envy of all.
The tapestry of our story
Is my favorite story of all.
Our paintings came together
and a mural was made.
They looked similar.
Apart they were interesting,
But together became captivating.
As we hold the brush together,
We hand it to the Master painter.
He shows us how beautiful
Our picture can truly be.
Step by step
We follow His movements,
Learning how to paint and live,
From the best.

Am I Dreaming?

I close my eyes,
and you're right here beside me.
In my dreams
We're never apart.
While awake,
You dance through the halls of my mind.
Someone so undeserved by me,
Has stolen my heart
Now I chase her
With all I've got,
Because she's all I want.
As she takes my hand,
I come to life.
She forgets my weakness,
Forgives my mistakes.
Time stops
When she's in my arms.
She is a miracle,
Something I struggle to understand.
Perfection exists only in dreams,
Yet I am not asleep.
Every movement,
Every thought,
So in sync.
She is perfect,
And somehow I can call her mine,
As she calls me hers.

If My Heart Was a House

All these thoughts and feelings
Racing through my head
I can’t erase your touch from my heart,
The memory of your kiss burnt into my lips.
How I long to hold you,
This very moment.
Promises made in solitude,
Forgive me for the times,
When I can’t shelter you from your demons,
When I can’t hold you tight,
And whisper in your ear how much I love you.
Forgive me,
When my words spill over themselves,
And I struggle to make sense.
Your face fills my dreams,
Your voice rings in my head.
I close my eyes,
And know that you are right here with me,
Our hearts are together,
Though apart, we’re never too far.
Forgive me for the distance,
Forgive me for my fear.
I stare into your eyes,
And a thousand conversations take place,
Not a word needs to be said,
I see you,
For everything you are.
You dodged my defenses,
You broke through my walls,
I have no need to hide from you,
You are all I want.
My closest friend,
My love.
When our fingers entwine,
And I pull you close,
My heart beat races,
My breathing speeds,
I am mesmerized by your eyes,
Shining brighter than any star.
You simply cannot understand
What you have done to me,
I have never felt so loved,
And I am at peace.
Can you feel my heart,
Though we are so far apart?
You are my home,
I long to return soon.

Never Again

You make me want to scream
To give up,
To not even try,
To say it is just not worth it.
How can this make you happy?
Does despair truly bring you joy?
Anger ravages my bones,
My rage has wearied my soul.
Too long this has gone on,
Too long I’ve let you have control.
Mistake after mistake
Has led up to this,
And I am so ready to let go.
Arms wide open,
Preparing for this jump,
The cliff is so welcoming,
The hands at the bottom,
So willing to bring me into darkness.
Wouldn’t that just thrill you.
To be the death of me.
Your touch is toxic,
Your words a poison
I grew accustomed to.
This game is over,
I’m letting go,
Get out of my head,
Stop talking,
Leave me alone,
Forget me,
As I forget you.

Something New

My thoughts are racing,
And I’ve lost track of reality,
My thoughts are ransacked,
Pieces of rubble
As I struggle to understand
How I got here.
You entered my life.
Now I’m left questioning
Everything I thought I ever understood.
I’m not alone,
Your hand is in mine,
You’re on this journey with me.
Where did you come from?
I can’t fathom where we’re going.
Do you know what’s going on?
The moment you took my hand,
We began this trip,
My heart is no longer my own,
We’re sprinting forward.
No promises of safety,
No guarantees.
I’m right here with you,
As we chase the sunrise
Of something new.
The race began yesterday,
And I’m not willing to quit.
I’m still wondering
How this will end,
But isn’t it about the journey,
Not the destination?
With you by my side,
I have your back,
We can make this work,
We’ll get to the end.
Is this a race,
You want to win?

Underserved Joy

Every mistake ever made,
Swirling through my consciousness,
Reminding me with every waking moment,
That I don’t deserve this.
I’m afraid to close my eyes at night,
In fear that when they open,
You’ll be gone,
Just as fast as you came.
As an angel of the night,
You arrived,
Bringing a God-sent peace.
You will never know
What you’ve done to my heart,
You’ll never understand
The healing you’ve started.
I lay awake at night
Wondering if you’re thinking of me,
The way I think of you.
You are so perfect,
I fear you are merely a dream.
How I long to touch your face,
To hold you close,
And whisper promises in your ear,
Of how we’ll be together forever.
The craziest of circumstances
Has brought us together,
Yet I cannot imagine my life
Any other way.